I’m Going To Have To Mentally Bitch Slap Myself

Happy Sunday friends!!!

We’ve had a crazy beautiful weekend here in Colorado so instead of sitting inside writing about myself on my stupid laptop I decided to take the time to go outside and play!

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We went on our first bike ride since Fall and Bridget took the opportunity to lay outside in the sunshine while she read her book.

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In fact, the only reason I’m sitting here talking to you now is because I just got back from a run with Scout and I’m waiting for Penelope to wake up so that I can do my grocery shopping.

This week was crazy busy and I felt like I needed some alone time to just sort out all of the stuff that has been rattling around in my head. After my run I felt much better and was able to jot down a few things that I need to accomplish within the next few days…

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I think it’s safe to say that I’m getting my ass kicked at the moment.

I busted my butt this past week trying to balance it all.  I did all of my assignments, I worked for nine hours a day and I even managed to go for a run a few times this week after school.

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I ran as fast as I could trying to beat the sun as it slipped behind the mountains. I have a feeling the longer the days get the longer my runs will become. I also managed to carve out some time with Bridget doing what we do best…

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Hoard books!

Is it weird that we have a tendency to pick out the same books from the teen section? It’s bad enough that my students love the fact that I’m addicted to Teen Wolf… I‘m just kidding I don’t really watch Teen Wolf. Yes, I do.

Over all, I feel like this week was the best week I’ve had since I’ve started this student teaching adventure. Brent really stepped up his game and made some really yummy healthy dinners for us this week. But then Thursday rolled around and I was really wishing it was Friday so I pretended like it really was Friday and ordered pizza for dinner. I did this during a moment of weakness. To be honest I was just really feeling sorry for myself for having worked so hard.

After eating the pizza (and drinking the beer that I bought to go with the pizza) a realization hit me. I was totally making excuses for why I should be able to eat like crap.

I’m tired.

I’ve worked so hard.

I just want to relax.

I’ve been responsible in all other aspects of my life, I deserve a chance to let loose.

Well guess what else is going to be let loose this May when my student teaching stint is over?

My thighs that’s what!

The weather is going to be deliciously warm and I’m going to want to go for a run in shorts so that I get can a tan on my pasty gams while I run in the sun. Only I’ll end up with a half wedgie sunburn line because my thighs are going to devour my shorts. Then I’ll hobble home with chapped thighs leaving a trail of traumatized people behind me on the running trail.

Don’t spend too much time trying to visualize the picture I just painted for you because it’s not pretty.

Basically, what I’m trying to tell you is that for the next 13 weeks I’m just going to have to suck it up and do my best. My true best… not the fake best I try to sell to myself when I don’t really want to apply the self-discipline it takes to actually meet goals.

This means I’m going to have to mentally bitch slap myself every time I try to justify what I know is wrong.

Here is a list of things I’m going to have to force myself to do in order to reach my goals:

  1. Eat lots of veggies.
  2. Drink lots of water. (Even if I’m not allowed to have a key to the big people bathroom at school.)
  3. Limit sugar intake.
  4. Only have one alcoholic beverage a week.
  5. Get over my mommy guilt and work out!

My goal is to weigh somewhere in the 170’s by the time I’m done with my student teaching simply because I’ve been stuck in the 180’s for WAY too long.

Weighing in the 180’s wouldn’t be a problem if I were healthy in that weight range but the truth is that I’m not. In fact, I’ve avoided going to the doctor because they are going to want me to test my cholesterol again. Last time I had it checked my levels were high and I don’t want to have to go back in and be put on cholesterol meds. The other goal will be to make a doctor appointment for the beginning of May in order to face the truth and see where I stand on all of that stuff. Hopefully all of my hard work will have paid off by then.

So I guess, this is the part where I tell you how much I weigh. Honestly I keep forgetting to weigh myself. So once again I missed out on the golden post morning pee weigh-in opportunity and had to run up stairs to weigh in for you guys again. I weighed 189.4. This is less than last week but still not where it needs to be. I’m also going to have to take monthly pictures next weekend. Honestly, I’m not really looking forward to it. Since I haven’t been lifting weights everything has gotten fluffier again. But this blog is about being brutally honest with myself so… brace yourself.

And with that I will leave you with two recipes that I plan on making this week…

The first one is Creamy Cauliflower Garlic Rice, which I plan on making tonight with grilled chicken and roasted asparagus.

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Doesn’t it look yummy?!

I was also in a French peasant kind of mood so I think I’ll make this split pea soup recipe from Ina Garten.

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I’m waiting for the cold weather to creep up again so that I can sit by the fire with my weekly glass of merlot, slopping up the last bits of this soup with a crusty piece of whole grain bread. Bridget and I will probably practice our French accents that night and Brent will rolls his eyes and pretend like he didn’t marry such a big dork.

Welp folks… I hear Penelope chirping in her crib. So I better head for the store…

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Hope you have a great week!

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